Search found 4 matches

I've got another one for you.

A woman drops off her car at a repair shop.
When she comes back to collect it the repairman says;
"I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."

Wow, I won? Awesome! Thanks guys.

I don't have any really big ones, but I do have a few smaller ones.

We can't make the stupid people go away-who would we have to laugh at when they fall down?

Lord, please put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth.

I would love to have a battle of wits with you...but you appear to be unarmed.

3 Chimps escaped from the zoo... 1 was caught watching tv... anther playing football and the third one was caught reading this text message.

I told my physiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet.

Don't knock on Death's door. Instead, ring the doorbell and run. He hates that.

Duct Tape is Like the Force...It has A light side or dark side and it holds the universe together.

That's all I've got for now. I hope you get a lol from some of them.

I'm not sure if this is going to count as a joke, but it should get some lols.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I cannot accept,
And the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I had to kill today because they ticked me off.

Mine is June 20th